


A memento of a perfect day

by Eule



Series: Of friendship, trust and failures  - Modern AU [6]
Category: The Musketeers (2014)
Genre: Beginning of brotherhood, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Minor Character Death Mentioned, and described
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-29
Updated: 2018-06-29
Packaged: 2019-05-30 17:57:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,906
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15101981
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eule/pseuds/Eule
Summary: Aramis and Porthos learn something about Athos past.





	A memento of a perfect day

**Author's Note:**

> I chose not to use warnings but Thomas dies in this one, there is blood and the last few seconds of his life mentioned but nothing to dire.

Athos knew that walking through the rain without a coat wasn’t a smart idea but he won’t go back to grab one. After their last case, a wife killing her brother-in-law because he found out about her double life, he can’t come to a rest. The whole scenario was so like his own history that it looked like a horrible joke from fate. 

Anne had killed Thomas because he had a proof that she wasn’t who she pretended to be and that her only purpose was to get as much money out of their marriage as possible. So she could live a comfortable and carefree life after his unexpected death or whatever plan she had had for him. A sickness he won’t recover from? Or a car accident with a drunken driver who fled from the scene of crime? She had not said which scenario she had planned for him or his lawyer had prevented him from hearing it. But that wasn’t important right now. He had to get his head back on, but he was in a downward spiral and here he was, walking in the rain.  
It was the middle of the third night without any hope of a restful sleep and he had fled out of his apartment. The few hours he got had been hell, he remembered vaguely waking up screaming at least twice. So he found himself wandering through the streets in the dark and tried to erase every thought of wifes and little brothers, who are dead because the elder brother wouldn’t listen, out of his head.  
But that wasn’t working; maybe he could tire himself out enough so that his body was to sleep deprived to let him dream anymore. 

Another solution was to grab a few bottles of his red wine and drink himself into oblivion, but he was past these days. He won’t fall back into old habits, so he sat on a park bench near a small lake instead and watched the raindrops creating small circles on the surface of the water and he let his mind wander. 

When he noticed the first rays of sunshine above the lake he began his way back home. He was in the need of a shower and some dry clothes before he has to go to work.

 

“You look like a mess my friend” Aramis stated after he had a closer look at Athos. A low grunt was the only response he got and Porthos put a cup of coffee in front of the older man. Athos looked blearily up at him and gave an approvingly nod after he had taken a sip. Black and hot, the only thing that would be able to make him get through this day.  
Aramis frowned and exchanged a worried look with Porthos. Athos looked totally exhausted and it got worse every day. Two days ago they had decided to speak with him. Food and a bottle of red wine in hand, but the house had been dark, the phone unanswered. They had checked the usual bars and pubs, but there was no sign of him. The barkeepers can’t remember when they had last seen him, probably with them, so it has to be a few weeks ago.

Yesterday had found them in the same situation and Aramis wanted to persuade Porthos to break into his house. It wouldn’t be housebreaking if they had a legitimate suspicion that something bad had happened. It would be more the kind of a rescue, but Porthos pointed out that it had a reason they weren’t in possession of a key and that they should respect Athos privacy.  
But he admitted that something was off and they had to find out what it was. 

Before one of them could start a further investigation D’Artagnans head appeared in the doorway. “Captain wants to see you in his office now. Now like five minutes ago, he sounded stressed.”  
Athos heaved himself out of his chair and followed the younger man out of their small office. Aramis sighted. “We will get him to tell us what is wrong.” Porthos nodded. “Yeah, but now move. The Captain wouldn’t be amused if he has to wait for us.”

 

Athos sat on his bench again. It wasn’t raining tonight but the wind was chilly and he could hear the rustle of the leaves nearby. He blinked and realized that he was crying silently. He was a mess, but can’t image a way out of this situation.  
He can’t sleep without seeing her in front of his eyes, feeling her fingertips on his skin, hearing her voice whispering words of comfort in his ear, before she begged him to belief her. Belief that his brother tried to rape her, that it was self-defense, seeing the blood of Thomas on her hands, hearing his struggle for one more breath. And then nothing, he hadn’t even tried to, had only stared at him with this wide blue eyes full of fear. She had stood next to him, babbling, but he had only seen his little brother, pleading him to help. But he hadn’t been able to and knew that he will never forget that moment. After Thomas birth he had sworn to protect him and had failed so spectacular. 

And because he can’t get them out of his head he had managed to bring everyone in danger today. He had ruined their mission, had brought Aramis and Porthos in danger even if no harm had been done. But he hadn’t seen one of the villains behind a door. It was his job to get that specific part of the storage hall clear. It hadn’t been, someone could have died today because of him.  
Athos let his head rest in his hands and sobbed.

 

“What do you mean, he isn’t here anymore?” Porthos growled at the unhappy nurse in front of him and Aramis put a comforting hand on his arm. “Sorry Madame, but my partner is a little bit stressed after our last case. You said that Lieutenant de la Fere isn’t in medical care anymore? How is this possible?” Aramis smiled his widest smile and hoped the nurse would say them where Athos was. Last time they had seen him was short after the bust. Some paramedics had loaded him into ambulance, so that they could dig a bullet out of his left arm. That happened three hours ago and they promised to grab him on their way home.  
So it was kind of unexpected that they were told he wasn’t here anymore. “Yes, he subscribed his discharge papers half an hour ago. We called a cab for him.”  
“And you let him go?” Porthos growled irritated.  
“Yes, as I said, he subscribed his discharge papers and wasn’t driving on his own. We had no reason to make him stay.” She spoke and looked slightly annoyed. They decided to leave the hospital, Athos wasn’t here anymore.

 

“So where do we start looking?” Porthos asked at the way to their car. Aramis shrugged. “We searched him for the last four nights. He was neither at home nor in one of the bars. I don’t know where he could be.” 

They sat together in silence for a few moments before Porthos spoke again and threw a questioning look at Aramis. “What if he decided go for a walk all those nights? He didn’t look like he had slept at all and there is a park near his house. You know, maybe he felt caged or something like that and had to be outside?”  
Aramis first thought was to make fun of the suggestion, but maybe he was right. Sitting alone in the cold and dark, maybe in the rain. Yes that description sounded so much like Athos that they would give it a try.

 

He can’t remember how long he sat on the bench, crying like a child. He had lost every sense of time and his surroundings. So he was more than surprised when he heard voices and felt someone was touching him. He flinched away, can’t see who tried to harm him. There were hands holding him, he struggled to get free, but he hasn’t much energy left and while his body failed him, his brain registered the voices.  
“God Athos, what happened? Shh. It is us, Aramis and Porthos. Don’t fight me.”  
Aramis and Porthos. His panicked brain told him that they meant safety. But he can’t see them, something was wrong. Maybe it was an imagination? Then there were warm hands at his cheeks.  
“Athos look at me. Open your eyes and look at me. Please.”  
Open your eyes, so he had them closed, which explained the darkness. He was able to do something against this. 

 

They had found Athos above an hours walk away from his home. He was hunched on a park bench, only in his grey and blood stained T-Shirt, shivering in the cool night air. His eyes were closed and it looked like he had cried a lot. Aramis heart crumpled at the sight. Now he sat in front of him, hands pressed against his to cold skin and forced a smile on his face when Athos stared at him with those wide and fearful green eyes. He had barely registered them but nodded when Aramis asked him if he knew who they are.  
Porthos draped his leather jacket over Athos shoulders and dialed Fleas number on his phone. Athos was in no fit state to walk the way back, even without their many detours it would be a walk over 30 minutes. His body was weakened by nights without sleep, cold and blood loss. 

“Flea will arrive within 20 minutes and drive us to whatever place we like. And she won’t tell a soul something about what happened here.” Porthos announced and Aramis was glad to hear that.  
“To us I think.” Aramis answered and Porthos nodded. They shared a flat since university and had seen no reason to change that afterwards. Both of them were single and didn’t mind to have breakfast with an unknown male or female which was the one-night-stand of the other. They even had a spare room and it wouldn’t be Athos’ first night in there.  
He had begun to trust them; they were partners for almost three years now. It had been a little rough at the beginning, with the two of them sticking together for years and a moody Athos, who didn’t talk but drunk himself into oblivion with a frightening regularity. He wasn’t talking more these days but his drinking habits had changed a lot. 

Aramis couldn’t smell alcohol on him right now and he was glad about it, but it stirred his concern. He hadn’t ever seen Athos this distraught.

By the time Flea dropped the three of them at their flat Athos eyes were heavy lidded and a few new tears had made their way down his face. But he can’t get himself to care, he was tired but fought sleep. He didn’t want to dream of her. He could hear Aramis and Porthos talking, but can’t made out the words. Probably he needed to talk to them. He has to, they had to know what had happened, what made him to neglect his job. And maybe they could made her go away. He dared to hope that they will understand, see why he can’t trust easily. Can probably see who he once was. God he wanted them to know. Wanted to open up and tell everything. Be loved again, but he can’t. He had done it once and had lost everything in the aftermath. He can’t do that again, but he wanted it so badly that it hurts.

 

Porthos guided Athos to the couch and wrapped his arms around the slim shoulders while Aramis searched for a warm blanket in his wardrobe. He mumbled comforting nonsense and Athos relaxed a little into his embrace. He seemed to be more aware of his surroundings but the panicked expression won’t leave his eyes.  
Porthos rubbed slow circles at his back and Aramis appeared with a new shirt, sweatpants and one of Porthos old hoodies at their side. “That’s a nice blanket you found” he said and Aramis grimaced. “Thought it would be a good idea to get him out of this blood stained clothes.” Porthos nodded and they helped Athos change in the clean ones. Athos didn’t protest and let the others handle him as they saw fit.  
Aramis was worried but can’t do something against the fond smile appearing on his face as he took a look at Athos small frame disappearing inside the big hoodie. He moved a little to slip back into Porthos warmth and hissed as he jarred his injured arm. 

“Do you want to take something against the pain? We brought the painkillers from the hospital.” Aramis asked and stood to grab them. But Athos shook his head and there were new tears in his eyes. Aramis crouched before Athos again and put a hand on his knee. “Athos you worry me, you have to speak to us. We want to help you, but we don’t know how, you have to talk to us.” Porthos cradled him a little further into his embrace and Athos took a few deep breaths but shook his head again before he looked at Aramis. “Can’t, but want to?” he croaked and to Aramis ears the last part sounded more like a question than a statement. Furthermore he thought that they will learn a lot more about Athos life than what happened the last few days when he decided to talk to them. 

Aramis stood again and made some tea, grabbed the box with the cookies out of the shelf and brought everything into the living room. Than he fetched the bottle of Brandy and three glasses and started a slow and kind of sad playlist for the background. He knew it wasn’t nice to do that, but they had to make Athos talk or he would break beneath the weight of his thoughts. He planned to use every even so dirty trick to make him talk to them.

In the end it didn’t need much pressure. Athos was exhausted, they could see it in every movement; hear it with every breath he took. He wanted to sleep, but the two times he nodded off he awoke with a start and looked as if he wanted to scream. After the second time he broke. 

 

Aramis was the first of them who took the bottle of brandy to pour them a glass. Athos told them about his little brother Thomas and a beautiful women called Anne, which he loved from the first sight. How they met and where they had had their first date. She loved forget-me-nots and her catlike eyes were so deep and fascinating and he could forget everything while being with her. Her lean figure in the dark blue dress she wore when he asked her to marry him and that unbelievable wedding a few months later. His brother was his best man, smiling all over his face, Catherine, his betrothed happy to be the next to marry. It had been a perfect day.  
And then the whole world came crashing down. Aramis felt like crying himself. Athos made some breaks to down some of the Brandy. While doing so Porthos got a second bottle, they will need it before the end, they all knew that. Athos told them everything, his voice rough and broken, silent tears falling down from distant eyes, captured in a past none of them had seen before. He could describe every detail of that awful day, the color of Thomas’ shirt and which knife Anne had used. It was an ornamental knife he used to open letters with. It wasn’t supposed for that work, but Anne had given it to him. On the left side was a small gravure “A mementum of a perfect day” and a stylized forget-me-not. They had been on a vacation shortly before their wedding and it has been the happiest and most precious time of his life. Anne had felt it as well and made this gift to him. With the gift of their happiest day beneath their wedding, she had killed his little brother. 

After that Athos had sobbed in the embrace of Porthos and Aramis, none of them had to ask what had brought back these memories.  
They drank the second bottle of Brandy in brotherly silence and as the first light made its way over the horizon, the three men were fast asleep on the couch. Athos in their middle, his exhausted body and tired mind unable to fight sleep for another night, but there weren’t any nightmares, he must not carry the weight of his past alone anymore. Aramis and Porthos had listened and instead of trying to convince him, that it wasn’t his fault that all of that had happened, they had promised him to be there for him, no matter what happened, whatever thoughts and self-doubts would come over him. They will listen and crawl into a bottle with him, but he should remember that he will never be alone again, that they won’t betray him and if he can’t believe it right know they will show him that they are serious, even if it will take years to proof that.


End file.
